living in mediaspace 0 living in mediaspace 1 azure, foofwa, and i are living in media space. the air is filled with electromagnetic discharge, cooling fans create a dis- turbing hum, wires snake through the room, we're in the midst of the mach- ine, the belly of it. living in mediaspace 2 there's no escape; the sound and radiation continues through the night, matched only by the bleak sun- rise and furnace roar, one toppling the other, the other toppling the one. living in mediaspace 3 it's here we create our body movements, over and over again, the irony of heavy labor in within the virtual, as we become aware of big iron, even in the smallest appliance - of the need for clean and proper protocols, as our body becomes increasingly filthy. living in mediaspace 4 century-and-a-half old brick walls, wooden floors, skylight and energy, wooden tables, several miles of tables, interoperability among machines ranging from yesterday to forty years ago, analog and digital regimes snaking into each other, patchcords and internal proprieties of memory; we're here, turning knobs, pulling levers, plugging and unplugging cords and cables, moving tripods, focusing cameras, aiming lights, speak- ing, singing, walking, dancing, playing, theorizing, discussing, eating, sleeping, excreting, shuddering, washing, dressing, typing, aligning, re- aligning, transforming input to output, output to input, looping through interruptions of storage media, replaying, rehearsing, recuperating. liv- ing in mediaspace 5 my hands move across the six strings of the electric guitar; they're not moving fast enough; when my fingers blur - then i know something is working - something is laboring properly - the output roars into being. living in mediaspace 6 intermittent taking of digital photo- graphs through the obdurate regime of the real: everything returns to the virtual; we're leaving our traces. living in mediaspace 7 thus tracing our cords - where does this one or that one go - following the line snaking among hundreds of others to the obverse side, interior, of the device or patchbay: they go on with three switches half-buried among distribution amplifiers and sync generators. living in mediaspace 8 the day is ready when the machines are ready; some remain on, alert and vigilant through the night; some sleep uneasily; some keep their clocks right on time. liv- ing in mediaspace 9 we are sure to be activated; there's no uncertainty; the bricks glow with data bombardment; we're becoming suffused; there's not a moment to lose; the machines are waiting, tapes and disks running; other storage media as well; there's always flash memory, wetware; the room pulses to a single sync; you can almost hear us living in mediaspace 10; you can almost hear us breathing __ living in mediaspace now there we are in the background, huddled naked against the dancer, this is very old-fashioned, dance and articulation, bodies and dreams of bod- ies, media11 as i play old-fashioned shakuhachi living-bamboo, mirage sam- pler, electric guitar, media12 against crashing shinto bell-gong sounds earlier recorded, media13, working through a barrage of errors, computers closing down after sound and videocards malfunction, removing the board making matters worse, media14, trying different .mov compressions and set- tling on sorenson 30-50 percent, putting aside temporarily the belkin usb input device, media15, although first uploading a character-generated text into a short video of wounding and sadness compressed like wap protocols, media16, working with both hi8 v5000 taping with noise reduction and time base correct, and dv all over, even with what's saved of jpegs on the zip drive played back through the g4 which handles the sorenson beautifully, media17, as usual i'm amazed at the labor involved in finding the right usb or rca or digital or s cables, moving from one to another conversion, usually ending, media18, at adobe premier, recording straight wording and harmonica through the mirage, media19, more and more impedance problems, how can all of this work together, media20, the videotoaster 4000 no long- er with us and the 2000 giving out right here, just now, but the images from the nikon 800 beautiful and tomorrow we'll set up the analog video synthesizer again for vocal switching, media21, while i'll play back the live mirage sound recorded on the sony professional cassette player, not dat, but with good plugin powered mikes, through the onkyo deck, while azure and i are working naked, shaved, elsewhere, dreams reflecting off bodies against brilliant difficult dance taken from nikuko parable texts and the problematics, media22, of ballet __ 23 living in 23 24 waking this morning, knowing i'm irrelevant to the world and all 25 my instantiations which will have maybe another twenty years of 26 creative life if alzheimer's doesn't get to me, azure and foofwa 27 asleep in their respective rooms (she's in the back of the main 28 studio with me, i'm typing in mediaspace on a pc laptop, there's 29 a pc next to me, then the video synthesizer (analog computer), 30 then a couple of amigas, then the mac g4, all surrounded by and 31 surrounding other dedicated units, actually the amigas are dedi- 32 cated, one running a frame-bragger* / processor, and the other a 33 time base corrector, as well as the dying toaster), am i dying, 34 it is another early morning, knowing i'm the old man fading into 35 the older brick walls, trying not to become too swamped by what 36 might be depression slogging in; i'm thinking - here i want to 37 become-, not -woman, but -digital, losing myself between one bit 38 and another, leaving the odd eternal life, and outside, just as 39 in joyce's story, it looks like snow and memories 40 *should be frame-grabber, but the typo works in affect 41 living in media41 _ living in 42 mediaspace delicate fluttering pink things in the wires over there labor of foofwa dance over here alan wants to be a machine more than any other thing azure will melt wires surround alan bleak insulation plastic almost smudged against circuit boards, sputtering out he doesn't become a man she doesn't become a woman ballet doesn't need dancers screens don't need cables rooms don't need ceilings cities don't need streets fluttering pink things don't need air __ l43i43m "43 yes a fingers and feet nightmare! your inscription finished, you have created thing." 43% completed defragmentation next to me. last night, too many cameras, five, too few microphones, one, too many devices, perhaps ten including the video analog synthesizer, too unprepared for embedding. :camera say hello to us and camera heal us the seals were broken. what little text escaped was drowned in flesh burst open by contrary bytes. blood short-circuited everything, including hearts and motherboards, mute blindness of cameras recording it all in the wires, my arms stuck out, and one leg was severed at the cable junction, all of us could feel incipient life growing, tumors in the midst of analog pots struggling to control signal feedbacks, keeping the graph clean on the waveform monitors your elegiac names my camera say hello to us and camera heal us "your the seals were broken. what little text escaped was drowned in flesh burst open by contrary bytes. blood short-circuited everything, including hearts and motherboards, mute blindness of cameras recording it all. -4394 text is your final enunciation. for 43 sutured hours, we have been dead and written. and it has taken you 43.450 minutes to write your last" "production with ideogrammar" _ living in media44space: the new piece 44 placing chinese chop below NOT ideogram 45 body under affect and 51 nipples dotted turned towards f luttered five camera 52 thus jagged against the other in fast switchin g 57 bodies in cave pulled out into and red on white skin of violent s exual revolution 61 switching controlled by audio 62 meaning, look, i di/s/ play myself, reading these from language erasure 46 thin labia of supine bo dy 47 NOT ideogram of violent sexual five camera flicked twisted body i nto body 50 handled penis of supine body incision of kanji ideogram flicked across frame 53 twisted body jagged 54 meaning 58 pulled meaning from bod ies flanged against dark blue 59 b lack revolution 48 writing NOT ideogram above the cunt and cock 49 flutte red smeared kanji before erasure after violent grasp 56 cameras shifted one _ living in mediaspace 60 we've finished fifteen pieces in three days. music sources include moog and mirage, electric guitar and voice, shakuhachi and harmonica. video processing includes adobe premier, an old titling program on an amiga, and the analog video synthesizer. other media include the usual computer prog- rams and everything's checked on the g4. shooting sites include a wildlife refuge about two miles from here, as well as the interior of the loft. other work produced includes about 45 digital photographs and a number of texts. there are several strands to all of this - working with the nikuko parables, working with a critique and sexualization of ballet, and working through systems of signs and the body. for once the intensity has remained through everything; we play back through premier, but also on cdrom, and we're finding ourselves constantly astounded. the space and architecture of the loft seem liquid, mobile; the movements and cameras are determining the reading of worlds, not proscenia. the pieces are also fragmenting; there may be several versions of each, and we don't choose between them but keep them all. burning them into cdroms which are write-once only gives them the perman- ency of sculpture, of inert materiality, the grain of the planet. it's as if we're there on-disk online re-enacting or recuperating the same move- ments and the same firewalls against death, as ever; we're caught, to be played backwards and forwards, repeatedly. you can see this in the seman- tics of the work itself; one of the pieces is a parable scrolling in re- verse, from top to bottom; through several loopings, the meaning, the time of it all, become clear. last night i dreamed of my mother again, with the same narratology - there is a traumatic interruption announcing her death, that she is death; i wake somewhat later, almost in tears. look at this, this looping in wetware under constant mismanagement; it is inconstancy which harbors memory, not the truth burned into microscopic tracks. it takes the pure light of a laser to read them. there seems to be a truth in nudity in all of this, something neither machine nor inscription can touch. it's as if what's signified - the pre- sentation of the naked sexualized body - converts only ikonically - that is, through representation, into itself, looped through the viewer, who completes the real. while foofwa is dancing, is a dancer, azure and myself stumble or present differently, and the difference draws dancer and danc- ing in; the fictivity of the dance is subverted by the labor and body of the dancer, and everything reaches or lathers around or through the same knot. look at this, look at this, look at this. ___ living in mediaspace: area 63 You're everywhere I'm not You're maybe all I've got I don't think I'm so hot You're everyone I'm not You're everywhere I'm not I'm maybe all you've got You don't think I'm so hot You're everyone I'm not You're everywhere I'm not We're maybe all we've got We don't think I'm so hot You're everyone I'm not I'm maybe half a bot You're everyone I'm not _ living in mediaspace 64lm we go on and off around the clock frames you can't do this as the architecture floats away 64lm we go on and off around the clock frames you can't do this as the architecture floats away 64lm we go on and off around the clock frames you can't do this as the architecture floats away around frames around the edges of the frames around frames around the edges of the frames daylight interferes with white balance desperation readout electricity breaths me into brickwork circuitry everything keys into everything else fluorescents for moving towards the blue and less noise halogens for the 360 degree lens mixup moving through space, a series of wipes and other slow transitions needing compression, no but 2k cutoff filter shaking and typing into the night: this time g4 voices across the room taping in the wildlife refuge on grey even days the others are always out there even when we're in the street this text slams itself through the other waking and sleeping are one and the same what happens with a blink or a blink of an eye without sleep everything in the world is performance you can see the universe between frames you can't do this as the architecture floats away _ Bridging from Albert A. Bennett, The Interpolational Polynomial, in Bennett, Milne, and Batement, Numerical Integration of Differential Equations, 1931. "If, as often happens in engineering problems, a function is adequately given by two separate simple algebraic formulas over adjoining parts of the range, a single polynomial of low order may afford a poor method of representing the situation even approximately. Thus if one is given the table," [Which can be summarized: As x takes successive values from -5 to 5, y successively equals 0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,3,4,5.] "then, by the use of a single polynomial, the value assigned to y at x = -6 is zero if one uses only the data from x = -5 to x = 0 inclusive. Using all the given data, however, one obtains y = 126 at x = -6. Similarly one obtains y = 798 at x = -7. Similarly one has for x = 6 y by the polynomial the value 132. These 'unreasonable' values are not confined to the results of extrapolation. The polynomial gives as the value of y at x = -4.5 the number -22. In examples of this sort, the engineering practice of using an 'easement' or 'transition' curve or 'bridging formula' over a critical region without regard to distant portions of the table is to be recommended for purposes of graduation or subtablation, if the evidence seems to justify a smooth graph. If a concentrated irregularity is to be preferred, interpolation formulas should be applied to the two sides of the break separately, ascending differences being used above the break, descending, below." This very critical example is intimately tied to the bundling of heuris- tics used in practice and salvaging natural law, described by Nancy Cart- wright in How the Laws of Physics Lie. I often use the example of x = 0,1,2,3,4,... and y = 0 except for, say, x = 84927, when y = 1. This may be the case on one hand with noise or random error; on the other, the ratio is meaningful - generates meaning - in particle physics experiments. (The whole phenomenology of meaning in relation to theory, organism, anom- aly, and domain is at work here.) Given the latitude of the real, in other words, meaning and interpretation are found at the heart of facticity. Although this is clearly evident in postmodernity studies, it's interesting to find it treated as a minor but prevalent problem, circumscribed as 'bridging,' in 1931. Think of it this way. There is no bridge, no gap; within the bridge or gap, meaning is generated - and it is meaning which has generated (the perception of) the bridge or gap as well. Resident in organsim, meaning is the weighted, cathected, intended real. Think of it this way: the real as shamed, smudged, spoiled - therein lies the boundary, culture and civil- ization as well. The bridge as bridging transcendentals is problematic; the bridge as meaning's interstice provides space and place for signifier and signification. It's the mouth. It's always the mouth. _ living in mediaspace 65 sondheim ttys8 65 dialin-bing03-03 Mon Nov 20 23:22 still logged in sondheim ttyr3 65 dialin-bing02-14 Mon Nov 20 21:11 - 21:27 (00:15) sondheim ttysc 65 dialin-bing03-01 Mon Nov 20 19:40 - 19:42 (00:01) sondheim ttyp6 65 dialin-bing03-01 Mon Nov 20 19:12 - 19:14 (00:01) sondheim ttyr3 65 dialin-bing03-01 Mon Nov 20 18:23 - 18:44 (00:21) sondheim ttys8 65 dialin-bing04-16 Mon Nov 20 15:54 - 15:57 (00:03) sondheim ttyt6 65 dialin-bing01-02 Mon Nov 20 11:21 - 11:34 (00:12) sondheim ttyp1 65 dialin-bing03-09 Mon Nov 20 05:22 - 05:22 (00:00) sondheim ttyp1 65 dialin-bing02-14 Mon Nov 20 02:48 - 02:53 (00:04) sondheim ttypf 65 dialin-bing02-14 Mon Nov 20 02:30 - 02:35 (00:05) sondheim ttyq8 65 dialin-bing02-14 Mon Nov 20 01:42 - 02:29 (00:47) sondheim ttyq2 65 dialin-bing02-12 Mon Nov 20 00:32 - 01:08 (00:35) sondheim ttys0 65 dialin-bing03-02 Sun Nov 19 22:04 - 22:06 (00:01) sondheim ttyqd 65 dialin-bing03-02 Sun Nov 19 21:39 - 21:47 (00:08) sondheim ttyr8 65 dialin-bing03-01 Sun Nov 19 18:17 - 18:42 (00:25) sondheim ttyp1 65 dialin-bing01-09 Sun Nov 19 14:47 - 14:51 (00:03) sondheim ttyrb 65 dialin-bing03-06 Sun Nov 19 12:16 - 12:19 (00:03) sondheim ttyr7 65 dialin-bing04-12 Sun Nov 19 10:26 - 10:54 (00:27) sondheim ttyp4 65 dialin-bing03-04 Sun Nov 19 04:54 - 05:14 (00:20) sondheim ttyp8 65 dialin-bing03-09 Sun Nov 19 03:02 - 03:27 (00:24) sondheim ttyq7 65 dialin-bing03-09 Sun Nov 19 02:27 - 02:30 (00:02) sondheim ttyp4 65 dialin-bing03-04 Sat Nov 18 23:02 - 23:18 (00:16) sondheim ttyre 65 dialin-bing04-12 Sat Nov 18 16:06 - 16:09 (00:03) sondheim ttyqd 65 dialin-bing04-12 Sat Nov 18 14:17 - 14:18 (00:00) sondheim ttyp1 65 dialin-bing03-05 Sat Nov 18 13:46 - 13:48 (00:02) sondheim ttyp0 65 dialin-bing03-05 Sat Nov 18 13:33 - 13:37 (00:04) sondheim ttyrb 65 dialin-bing04-18 Sat Nov 18 11:33 - 11:42 (00:08) sondheim ttyqc 65 dialin-bing04-10 Sat Nov 18 09:27 - 10:02 (00:35) sondheim ttyq6 65 dialin-bing04-15 Sat Nov 18 02:55 - 03:25 (00:29) sondheim ttyq4 65 dialin-bing04-12 Sat Nov 18 01:55 - 01:55 (00:00) sondheim ttypa 65 dialin-bing04-12 Sat Nov 18 01:34 - 01:41 (00:06) sondheim ttyp8 65 dialin-bing02-11 Fri Nov 17 16:35 - 16:46 (00:10) sondheim ttyta 65 dialin-bing03-02 Fri Nov 17 10:15 - 10:44 (00:29) sondheim ttys9 65 dialin-bing03-02 Fri Nov 17 10:05 - 10:14 (00:09) sondheim ttypa 65 dialin-bing02-10 Fri Nov 17 03:20 - 03:29 (00:09) sondheim ttypa 65 dialin-bing02-16 Fri Nov 17 01:28 - 01:47 (00:18) sondheim ttyra 65 dialin-bing02-15 Thu Nov 16 20:03 - 20:05 (00:02) sondheim ttyq2 65 dialin-bing02-15 Thu Nov 16 19:31 - 19:38 (00:07) sondheim ttyq5 65 dialin-bing02-15 Thu Nov 16 18:46 - 18:59 (00:12) sondheim ttyt5 65 dialin-bing03-05 Thu Nov 16 15:43 - 15:47 (00:04) sondheim ttyre 65 dialin-bing03-05 Thu Nov 16 15:34 - 15:37 (00:03) wtmp begins Thu Nov 16 15:00 __ living in mediaspace route 66 We already have a good perspective on the twentieth century. It was a cen- tury of mechanized iron, of massive wars resulting from global imperiali- sms. It was a century of burgeoning electrical, then electronic, communi- cations, a century of entertainments and the fragmenting of grand narra- tives - national and otherwise. It was a century of amazing scientific progress, and the exploration of the farthest reaches of the earth. It was a century of terrorisms and bombs, the century in which the population crises and world-wide pollution appeared catastrophic for the first time In mediaspace route 66 we are living tenth-alive tenth-virtual tenth-ava- tar tenth-prosthetic tenth-bot tenth-inert tenth-transmitter tenth-recei- ver tenth-sexual tenth-dead in eighth-inert eighth-physical eighth-real eighth-abstracted eighth-virtual eighth-affective eighth-subaltern eighth- imaginary space; in mediaspace route 66 we are living among worlds, within worlds, in-between worlds, beneath worlds, above worlds, outside worlds; in mediaspace route 66 we are traveling and remaining still; in mediaspace route 66 we are through the wires and the wires through; in mediaspace route 66 we are on the screen and in the screen and beyond the screen and before the screen; in mediaspace route 66 we are within the hearing of the same and the other, within the scent and touch of the same and the other, within the sight and the sound of the same and the other, within the taste of the same and the other; in mediaspace route 66 we are the virtual of the other and the other of the virtual and we are the real of the other and the other of the real; in mediaspace route 66 we are the virtual of the real and the real of the other; in mediaspace route 66; in mediaspace route 66 It was a century in which we began to grasp the foundations of physical reality and the foundations of biological existence, and it was a century of knots and the problematizing of closed classical systems of logics, mathematics, and everything else. It was a century in which the idea of space and lived and inhabited space became worrisome. It was a century of images, the imaginary, and anguish _ Report of a talk I gave a talk to a few of McKenzie Wark's students and others and stumbled through the entire thing, the result of no sleep and even for the first time an inability to focus; I felt sick. But I did manage to talk about - taking off from Anthony Wilden's work of a few decades ago - the radical moment we live in, a moment in which the digital regime begins to replace the analogical. I talked about, apologizing all the while for exhaustion, the relation of the analogical to deep identity, identity all the way down, and the digital in relation to skittered surface equivalences - and the differences between the two. Equivalence has no original; entities are defined by attributes and solely by attributes, as if what it does in any particular case, any other within the regime does in any particular case. But from identity, nothing can be determined... I spoke about tolerances as well as facticity - a tree represented by a single pixel in relation to another pixel representing a second tree, the pixels equivalent - and what that says about the identity of the referent, if anything. Half falling over, I briefly described Tarski's work on truth (it was Tarski who cri- tiqued Spencer Brown's Laws of Form, which I discussed briefly afterwards) - as well as truth both in terms of deep identity (bringing in Saul Krip- ke's theory of rigid designators, natural kinds, and possible worlds), and equivalences - skittered and situational truths requiring almost a Tertul- lian to look for grounding in absurdity - the alternative being proto-fas- cism. I spoke about mediaspace as well, a combination of analog and dig- ital regimes of projections and introjections. I talked about language as performativity, and the different phenomenologies of linux prompts on one hand and microsoft windows systems on the other - areas of the screens de- fined as potentials, closed source vs. open source software (appliance and structural/configurable models), and using programs as catalysts for writ- ing. Utterly exhausted and swimming in seminar space, I spoke about the Book/Ends conference in Albany I had recently attended, and how the mourn- ful attitude of the Derrideans towards the book was based on notions of deep truth and identity; it was this identity regime that was becoming in- creasingly problematized, as evident from intellectual property issues, privacy issues, censorship issues, and so forth, online. I also talked about the media people at the conference, and their feeling of exclusions - as well as excitement over working and skittering across borders and protocols, working towards planetary distribution systems. I talked about how the media people talked a lot about protocols and techniques and shar- ing these things, all of which are, like intensely situated truths, skit- tered equivalences, interoperabilities in computer terms. So that it was in a sense an entire older vision of the humanities, of human-ism, that was at stake here. Almost entirely asleep, the outline from the pda so blurred I couldn't read it, I spoke about translations of analog into dig- ital and digital into analog, and the notions of generations in videotape - analog lasting with 3/4" for example maybe five generations at the most, while digital can last thousands, with intensely slow accumulations of errors, since the potential well - the plateau of writing - was much high- er than the level of random noise (very high signal to noise ratio). I spoke as well about fluidity, and the influence Brossard, Irigaray, and Kristeva have had on my work, and how on one hand one might consider flu- idity as a fundamental characteristic of the internet, and, on the other, there are also hackers and others who find the net a domain of potential and totalized power, not fluid at all but penetrable, able to be violated, controlled. Stumbling near the equipment table, I mumbled about gender on internet relay chat, and some of Nikuko's activities there. Nearly sound asleep and shaking with exhaustion by this point, I concluded by reading two texts from the mediaspace series. After dinner with a few people, I returned with Azure to the media center. Foofwa has already left on a bus and we continue here, living in mediaspace 67, for a few more days. I write, still shaking, into the night. Azure is asleep. I think about fun- damental ontologies and their relationship to the analogical and identity - which I also talked about, deep ontologies - and problematized epistem- ologies of digital partial-domains always already undergoing reconnection - always already surface and skittered. Tonight I'll read in bed again, trying once more to make everything whole, or at least livable for anoth- er day. Tomorrow, I'll send this out. _ living in mediaspace68 68, azure reading, walking through the field 69, azure reading, walking down the path at a distance 79, azure reading, walking down the path a shorter distance 80, azure reading, approaching the camera from a shorter distance 81, azure reading, closer, walking down the path in winter 82, azure reading, in the woods near a small gorge, trees, streams, rocks 83, azure reading, walking by forked trees by the side of the gorge 84, azure reading, partially hidden by trees by the side of the gorge 85, azure reading, walking along a circular forest path 86, azure reading, turned slightly closer along the circular forest path 87, azure reading, walking by trees uprooted near a frozen marsh 88, azure reading, walking from a distance in the forest 89, azure reading, walking, bundled up, reading and walking the great forest towers above azure, azure is reading in the great forest the frozen marsh surrounds azure, azure is reading in the frozen marsh 90, reading of this world and another one before one's very eyes 91, reading of other worlds, and this one before one's very eyes - i will stop death by placing a tiny pebble in front of me i will stop death's hard breathing by placing a small rock i will stop death's approach by placing another stone i will stop death's reading and writing by placing a boulder a hill and a mountain, i will stop death in its tracks a mountain and a planet, i will stop death's hard breathing - among them or before them all, azure, a wild reading a wild breathing, swaying, you can't hear a thing azure's screaming worlds, and words won't come azure's screaming words, and worlds won't come - death, forestall us in the forest, hinder our uneasy ways death, caress us against moving grids and cyclones, turn our images turn our images away from ourselves, the world erupts in desire desire burns through the world, death save us, protect us, caress us - in the forest, walking across the tiniest leaves the motions of light delicately walking and exploring the interior of a camera - 92, azure walking in the forest, reading 93, azure reading in the forest, walking - endlim thrnad t$pa $ftr t$p $ftar t$pa brhlsad spllntarad rp$r-smllas :cameras through noise-turned-on grid against fragmented labia cock scattered against nikuko dream story parable. paraparaparapa :llvlng ln madl$sp$ca 98 brhlsa cpnthslpn bpdy sc$rrad st$r-bpdy bhrnad ln sllt scraanad bpdy spllntarad. ::one day nikuko and izanagi your coming one day izanagi and nikuko is in-me my into one day nikuko your impossible connects my one day nikuko with needle park thrnad naadla-chnt pn bnc thrnad naadla-chnt pn rc$ thrnad naadla-chnt pn qh$rtar-ln thrnad naadla-chnt pn mlnlplhg :turned lost-body-skin sorenson codec turned living in mediaspace 99 turned last excess moment turned needle-cock cable-jack :thrnad wprld-scra$mad hhngar-cpck $g$lnst brhlsad bpdy dv-t$pa hl-t$pa lpst bhrnad sc$n-llna axcass: thrnad spranspn cpdac :1/2:1/2 thrnad wprld-scra$mad hhngar-cpck $g$lnst brhlsad bpdy dv-t$pa hl-t$pa lpst bhrnad sc$n-llna axcass: thrnad spranspn cpdac transforms your thrnad naadla-chnt pn bnc thrnad naadla-chnt pn rc$ thrnad naadla-chnt pn qh$rtar-ln thrnad naadla-chnt pn mlnlplhg on me on me reds and blues thrnad ideogrammar _ living in mediaspace C:\network>ftp panix3.panix.com Connected to panix3.panix.com. 220 panix3.panix.com FTP server (Version: 7.1.0) ready. User (panix3.panix.com:(none)): sondheim 331 Password required for sondheim. Password: 230- NetBSD 1.4.3 (PANIX-USER-DDB) #0: Wed Oct 11 16:44:23 EDT 2000 230- 230 User sondheim logged in. ftp> get lq 200 PORT command successful. 150 Opening ASCII mode data connection for 'lq' (29063 bytes). 226 Transfer complete. 29656 bytes received in 5.43 seconds (5.46 Kbytes/sec) 189 I've liked the living in mediaspace texts you've been writing. ftp> thank you. 189 They've touched on a lot of things I've been thinking about. ftp> I appreciate this. 189 You'll have to keep me informed, where you go from here. ftp> I promise I will. ftp> bye 221 Goodbye. C:\network> __ her fault sonnet philosophy of exchange [No messages in folder] Pine finished -- Closed empty folder "INBOX" It looks like sex and violence won out. Sun Nov 26 01:11:42 EST 2000 you own my cock The Moon is New i own your cunt Ju1lu% ph {stty} we are still here Ju2lu% i'm angry and i'm back Ju3lu% not both a and b neither a nor b Ju4lu% Sun Nov 26 01:14:55 EST 2000 Three Minutes What More do You Want Ju5lu% hello yes yes hello hello 0.00s real 0.00s user 0.00s system Ju6lu% stop swearing nikuko and alan Jennifer said No Minutes _ remnant of party joke Devour nice julu poorly partying ! that's rich Your nice is in my lively ::uluj:ohw eno eht er'uoy:uluj uluj ,uoy fo hguone dah ev'i:uluj uoy fo tuo:::roop a s'taht:uluj esnopser hcir yllaer a s'taht:uluj ylroop gniod m'i:: !dworc-tsaf-eht-fo-uluj ,roop a s'taht:uluj esnopser hcir yllaer a s'taht:uluj ylroop gniod m'i:: ,em htiw emoh emoC ekoj a rof esucxe roop a s'taht:uluj::4:62772::uluj:uluj uluj ,ti detrats citoruen ym ni si hguone s'taht ,uluj:uluj ekoj a rof esucxe roop a s'taht:uluj ylroop gniod dirolf ruoY you're so fucking poor you're rich do you want a little fucking julu roop a s'taht:uluj esnopser hcir yllaer a s'taht:uluj ylroop gniod m'i:: tsuj m'i syad eseht fo emos:uluj esuohroop eht rof ydaer m'i:uluj ekoj hguone s'taht ,uluj:uluj ekoj a rof esucxe roop a s'taht:uluj ylroop gniod ohw eno eht er'uoy:uluj uluj ,uoy fo hguone dah ev'i:uluj uoy fo tuo ekoj a rof esucxe roop a s'taht:uluj::4:62772::uluj:uluj uluj ,ti detrats Devour nice julu-of-the partying ! Your nice is in my lively ::uluj ::i'm doing poorly julu:that's a really rich response julu:that's a poor:::out o f you julu:i've had enough of you, julu julu:you're the one who:julu:: ylevil my ni si ecin ruoY that's rich ! gniytrap eht-fo-uluj ecin ruoveD Come home with me, ::i'm doing poorly julu:that's a really rich response julu:th at's a poor, julu-doing-poorly ! do you want a little fucking, julu Your florid doing poorly julu:that's a poor excuse for a joke julu:julu, that's enough is in my neurotic started it, julu julu:julu::27726:4::julu:that's a poor excuse for a joke __ 101 retrospective: living in mediaspace 102 living in Medeaspace 0, we will claw and crawl our scarred bodies, we will not murder the children, we will murder the children, we will drink our blood, we will murder the children, our children, our texts 103 living in Medeaspace 1 azure, foofwa, and i are living in Medea space. the 104 line, the belly of it. living in Medeaspace 2 there's no escape; the sound 105 living in Medeaspace 3 it's here we create our body move- ments, over and 106 Medeaspace in 4 century-and-a-half old brick walls, wooden floors, skylight 107 being in Medeaspace 5 my hands move across the six strings of the electric being 108 into being. living in Medeaspace 6 intermittent taking of digital 109 virtual photos; we're leaving our tra- ces. living in Medeaspace 7 thus tracing our 110 amplifiers and sync gen- erators. living in Medeaspace 8 the day is ready 111 living in Medeaspace 9 we are sure to be activated; there's no uncertainty; 112 room pulses to a single sync; you can almost hear us living in Medeaspace, we will not murder the children, turn them on, turn you on, turn them on, we will murder our children, our texts 113 living in Medeaspace 114 28 studio with me, i'm typing in Medeaspace on a pc laptop, there's 115 living in 42 Medeaspace 116 living in Medea- space 60 117 living in Medeaspace: area 63 118 living in Medeaspace 119 living in Medeaspace 65 120 living in Medeaspace route 66, we will mur- der the children, we will claw our scars, we will tear our skins, we will murder our children, our children, our texts 121 In Medeaspace route 66 we are living tenth-alive tenth-virtual tenth- living in 122 imaginary space; in Medeaspace route 66 we are living among worlds, within 123 in Medeaspace route 66 we are traveling and remaining still; in Medeaspace 124 route 66 we are through the wires and the wires through; in Medeaspace 125 before the screen; in Medeaspace route 66 we are within the hearing 126 of the same and the other; in Medeaspace route 66 we are the virtual of 127 and the other of the real; in Medeaspace route 66 we are the virtual of 128 the real and the real of the other; in Medeaspace route 66; in Medeaspace 129 iism. I spoke about Medeaspace as well, a combination of analog and 130 two texts from the Medeaspace ser- ies. after dinner with a few people, 131 we continue here, living in Mede- aspace 67, for a few more days, we will tear our skin to pieces, we will tear our children, our texts, we will murder our children 132 living in Medeaspace68 133 :turned lost-body-skin sorenson codec turned living in Medeaspace 99 134 living in Medeaspace 135 189 I've liked the living in Medeaspace texts you've been writing, we will not tear our love to pieces, we will murder our bodies, we will murder our children, our children, our texts __ NIKUKO STALKS. NIKUKO SAYS: ________________________________________________ /IT'S JUDGEMENT THAT DEFEATS US. | |] ]]] ] ]] ]]]]] ] | | ] ] ] ] | | ] ] ] ] ] ] ]] ]] | |11111]11111111111]111111]11111111111111111111111| |222]2222222222222222222222]22]222222222222222222| |3]33333333333]3]33]333333]3333]33333333333333333| |444444]]44]444444444]4444444]4444444444444444444| |555555555]5]]55555555]5]555555555555555555555555| |6666666666666666666666]6666666666666666666666666| |77]77777]777777777777777777777777777777777777777| |88]8888888888888]8888888888888]88888888888888888| |]99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999| |________________________________________________| NIKUKO SAYS: IT'S JUDGEMENT THAT DEFEATS US. NIKUKO QUOTES KURTZ IN APOCALYPSE NOW. NIKUKO SAYS: IT'S JUDGEMENT THAT DEFEATS US. NIKUKO CARRIES A GUN. SHE KILLS JENNIFER. SHE BURIES HER HEAD IN SAND. SHE PULLS OUT HER TONGUE. SHE PULLS OUT HER EYES. SHE PULLS OUT NIKUKO'S TONGUE. SHE PULLS OUT NIKUKO'S EYES. THEY SAY: IT'S JUDGEMENT THAT DEFEATS US. A MISSILE OR A MISSIVE FROM DERRIDA. N. KILLS DERRIDA. N. KILLS ALAN. SHE PULLS OUT THEIR EYES. SHE PULLS OUT HER EYES. SHE CUTS OFF THEIR COCKS. SHE PUTS THEM IN HER MOUTH. SHE WEARS EARS. DERRIDA SAYS: IT'S JUDGEMENT THAT DEFEATS US. ALAN CRAWLS TO A NEW COUNTRY. HE IS NAKED AND BRAMBLES CUT HIS SKIN. HE IS ALONE IN THE NEW COUNTRY. HE CAN'T FUCK AND HE CAN'T HEAR. HE CAN'T SEE. HE CARRIES THEIR EYES. JENNIFER IS SCREAMING: IT'S JUDGEMENT THAT DEFEATS US. AIR GOES IN AND OUT HER NECK. JULU IS TORN APART. HER TEETH ARE BROKEN FROM HER FACE. HER FACE IS BROKEN. THE EYES OF NIKUKO ARE CUT OPEN. JULU SMEARS THEM ON HER BREASTS. JULU CANNOT HEAR. DERRIDA IS BATTERED WITH N.'S BONES. N. SCREAMS: IT'S JUDGEMENT THAT DEFEATS US. N. CAN'T FUCK AND CAN'T HEAR. N.'S BONES ARE EVERYWHERE. J. SCREAMS: IT'S JUDGEMENT THAT DEFEAT US. ALAN STALKS. ALAN SAYS: ________________________________________________ /IT'S JUDGEMENT THAT DEFEATS US. | |] ]]] ] ]] ]]]]] ] | | ] ] ] ] | | ] ] ] ] ] ] ]] ]] | |11111]11111111111]111111]11111111111111111111111| |222]2222222222222222222222]22]222222222222222222| |3]33333333333]3]33]333333]3333]33333333333333333| |444444]]44]444444444]4444444]4444444444444444444| |555555555]5]]55555555]5]555555555555555555555555| |6666666666666666666666]6666666666666666666666666| |77]77777]777777777777777777777777777777777777777| |88]8888888888888]8888888888888]88888888888888888| |]99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999| |________________________________________________| ___ ----- The following addresses had permanent fatal errors ----- <@PIRONET.DE> ----- Transcript of session follows ----- ... while talking to pkhost.piro.net.: >>> RCPT To:<@PIRONET.DE> <<< 550 <@PIRONET.DE>... User unknown 550 <@PIRONET.DE>... User unknown Subject: |+| REINHARD I HAVE REMOVED YOU FROM THIS MISSIVE OR THIS MISSILE. REINHARD YOU KNOW WHO I AM. REINHARD I KEEP YOU AROUND TO CONJURE THE MISSING. REINHARD WHO AMONG US IS NOT OF THE MISSING. REINHARD YOU DO NOT KNOW WHO I AM. everyday i get error messages about reinhard, user unknown. i don't delete the name; it keep it subscribed. THE NAME HAS NO REFERENT. daily i remind myself: a name is only a name and nothing more. REINHARD YOU CONJURE THE MESSAGE OF ERRORS. REINHARD YOU CONJURE THE MISSING INTO EXISTENCE. daily, reinhard, i hear your name. daily ... __ [trad] knowledge of which makes or performs knowledge crawled through the gnawed jaw of the glen, jennifer spotted the milk- white toothed polypore wrapped around the edged trunk crashed hard into the forest floor; before long white cheese polypore were showing up ev- erywhere. consider this: dusk, moss, water, ice, winter polypore survival, breathing hard heterologically. carbon balls and cushions covered the edges of things, every and all other asunder. wet-rot, reddish-brown crust, dry-rot, bear lentinus, violet toothed polypore flesh-tooth polypore grubbed, thought scrabbled milk-white breasts bared before icicles: punctum forms among yellow-red gill polypore tongued on tree, creates activity of violation-fabric, desire-irruption split-pore polyporaceae, labia near rock-caves, cracked into this discourse. conundrum among fleshed-out polyporaceae, transcendent knowledge of small hard nipple disruptive of ration, provoking inquiry into which life-flesh polypore inserted _ 1 Nov 30 To: Cyb can do anything want to do are free to b whomever you want to to become that person you can anything you want on this planet can say or anything! on this you can do anything here> you want! here here> or not as your desires! right now! on this planet! become that very are free to you want t here> become :you can do < here> anything you want to here> do::on this planet you do anything you your imperative names on this planet you say or be anything! assertion with i deogrammar _ Crying of Wolf Nikuko cried wolf when she yammered about being dismembered. Alan cried wolf when he cried and scratched himself over deep depression. Jennifer cried wolf over virginity and Julu cried wolf over Nikuko. Nikuko cried wolf over murder and mayhem. Alan and Jennifer cried wolf over the spil- ling of blood. Over and over again, the quartet cried wolf over rape and wound, death and annihilation, destruction and castration, the cutting- off of limbs, scraping-out of eyes, tearing-off of ears and tongues. Nothing happened to the quartet as they cried wolf over and over again. Then one day ... __ Folg mich! Nikuko is my shtik! Emmis! I wanna shtup her all the time, she says I'm a piece of drek, the gonif. Shush, she'll here you, I don't care, I'm a chosid. Whatta life! It's a meshugeneh velt! I tell you, maybe she'll want me! Efsher! Ei! Ei! Right now, it's kaddish for the lot of them! She wants Jennifer, can you imagine them stupping? Jennifer's such a klotz! I tell you. Lookit her, screaming Shveig! across the room. Nikuko's tsitskehs are beautiful, Vai iz mir! Jennifer's yelling, S'art mich vi di vant! Mameh's had it right from the beginning. I'm thinking Nikuko's pirgeh, her loch, right in my face! Jennifer, stop with your Zeit gezunt! If you're leaving, leave! Don't be so narish, okay? Zol zein azoy! It's my shtik, my piece, and I'm sticking to it! Nikuko calls me an alter kucker: I love it! Emmis, I'm on the level! Emmis - Nikuko on the shtik! Loch in kop! _ Whazzis? I can't believe I'm not response to! Shnorrers all of you, I've got what you want! Nar ainer! You think this is some sort of shtik? You should see what I've got left over! So much shmaltz! Food for the taking, so what if it's traif! I don't hear from you, I don't hear from Tateh, no one comes calling! I gotta speak english to be understood? Vershet? Zeh nor, zeh nor! I haven't got all day! Opgeflickt! It's over, it's over! Too much shmuts! Whazzis, lessgo Nikuko, we're outta here! _ fighting space so far on one cdrom, edited, re-edited w/sorenson compression, mp3, etc.: 40 minutes music 500 images (gif, jpeg, bmp) 40-50 small programs 18 video pieces totaling about an hour 5000 pages print 5-6 flash pieces (collaborations all; i can't work flash myself) 2 websuites 40 articles my own website which includes the pages print above as well as: dhtml and javascript work 2 vrml pieces still 25 megabytes left. you go from original video thru belkin to avi and from that to sorenson quicktime at 33%, audio kept 16 bit but 11k at the top which does a good job getting rid of hiss. original video shooting on hi8 and dv, edited on premier and soundforge. html stuff on dream weaver, hand type, netscape, corel. still images on everything from alchemy through 2 photoshops, psp, display, corel, gimp, about 25 other programs. polypore images direct from nikon 800. program images originally run in qbasic. texts made in pico, as well as 3 ascii editors from thailand, emacs, dos editor, and dana, among others. text programs from display, perl, ti59 programming (years ago), and the various small apps in /usr/games for linux/unix. music with moog, shakuhachi, wes- tern flute, electric guitar, mirage; the guitar feeds through an effects box to a small marshall amp which simulates tube design. work stems anywhere from early 70s (pascal programming) through the most recent double residency at the experimental television center, which pro- duce most of the recent videos. cameras used were sony hi 8s and dvs, as well as numerous smaller cameras, including some panasonics and quick-cams - about 13 cameras in all. the residency was with foofwa d'imobilite and azure carter; we produced about 100 images, 20 videos, couple of hours of audio; there are several parables of nikuko videos on the cdrom, as well as seals, a new piece, and pieces dealing with swaying and just about falling. the videos resonate with each other, with the texts, with the still images, with some of the music/soundwork. oh i can move among spaces and places here forever. oh for the amazed contents of a disk, and who cares about production value when intense content bursts through anything, asserts itself in the corner of a screen, looms large in one's dreams. 25 megabytes left, the rest of my/our lives ... _ Tainted Love Is Julu wearing your ... , are you wearing your thing? I love your feel- ings, Scalar value @a[$gen1] better written as $a[$gen1] at ./julua line 88. ... love oozes me staining your thing! Scalar value @prep[$pre] better written as $prep[$pre] at ./julua line 88. calls forth tainted womb, eat- ing, excreting memory, confusing the neurotic, Scalar value @prep[$pre] better written as $prep[$pre] a t ./julua line 88. is cotton, neurotic, Scalar value @noun[$non] better written as $noun[$non] at ./julua line 88.? ... womb is Scalar value @a[$gen] better written as $a[$gen] at ./ju- lua line 88. here, it's womb? Scalar value @prep[$pre] better written as $prep[$pre] at ./julua line 88.:Scalar value @noun[$non] better written as $noun[$non] at ./julua line 88.:Scalar value @a[$gen1] better written as $a[$gen1] at ./julua line 88 :./julua line 111. Scalar value @a[$gen2] better written as $a[$gen2] at :Scalar value @noun[$non] better written as $noun[$non] at ./julua line 88. Come home with me, Scalar value prep[$pre] better written as $prep[$pre] at ./julua line 88., julu-error-sullied! Your tainted skin at ./julua line 108. Scalar value @a[$non] better writ- ten as $a[$non] at is in my neurotic Scalar value @a[$gen] better written as $a[$gen] at ./julua line 88. You melt into Julu's skin forever... _ TTTT Tinted Love: That my skin changed coloration, texture, transparency, pixel value, hex value, color depth, that it sounded like a drum when you shoved yourself through me, that the edges turned pink-red or blue-black with the force of it, that you wrote all over me with your felt, tipped, pen :: Tented Love: That you held me unwillingly as a captive, that you gagged me, stopped me from calling out, that you promised me nothing but shoved breath hard into me, that you put me in your pen, that you closed the flap behind me :: Taunted Love: That you promised me everything, kept leading me on, pushing into me, driving your car write over me, screaming into my ear, fucking me with your pencil with the lead out :: Write your Tainted Love: That you loved me without taunted love, that you held me without tented love, that you pulled me without tinted love, that you released me, that you asked nothing for everything, that you offered yourself in truth, that you offered your skin to me, that you offered yourself in writing :: Tainted Love: That you tainted love :: that you offered your skin to me, that you offered yourself in writing :: that you wrote all over me with your felt, tipped, pen :: _ thwarted riddle: i have a thick neck, a wrestler's neck. when i move, all of my parts move with me. they claw the air with muck. they retain the same position in relation to me. they do not worship me nor harbor ill intent. what am i but a winter tree. _ European Master Narratives (From Larousse, World Mythology, ed.Pierre Grimal, trans. Patricia Beardsworth, 1973, area titles with shuffled attributes) Siberia: Society and Tradition Eskimo Lands: Gods by Conquest Rome: Magic Animals Finland-Ugria: The Eternal Cycle Japan: Myth in History Celtic Lands: Nature Worship Egypt: The Mortal Gods Empires of the Ancient Near East: Myth and Logic China: Folk-Lore of the Forests Western Semitic Lands: Creation and Destruction Oceania: Spirits of Good and Evil Germanic Lands: The Idea of the Supreme God Baltic Lands: Gods of Sacrifice Africa: Gods by Conquest Central America: Syncretism and State Religion North America: Cosmic Dualism _ brief note from Nikuko - "I can drive the voices out of my head temporarily by asking them to shut up, be quiet; sometimes this leads to more and more chatter as one objection after another is offered. It's exhausting. Sometimes there's a break of a few seconds, though, during which I regain strength, inhabit silence, rest. I almost beg them. I'll whisper to them, as if that would make any difference. They go on about all sorts of things. They in- sist they have nowhere else to talk. Usually it's about trivia - things to do, events of the day, the latest gossip, revenge scenarios. I've tried to take more control - I really have. If I start singing, one or another of them takes over, and that's no help. I wonder who's making the requests; I desperately need sleep, not these incessant voices ..." __ CRACK FILED EYE: D:\ARCHIVE of everything +--NETWORK of very best thought +--IM- AGE of me | +--SHRINE of flesh and bone | +--PROGRAM to be better person | \--POLYPORE of blood +--VIDEO of naked bone +--MUSIC in heart +--BOOK of life of life | +--TALK among friend and lover | \--NIKUKO mistress naked body +--HTML of body limb for you | +--FRAC turned thought of crystal world | +--NARCISSISTIC DISTURBANCE of dirty hole | \--WATER over bone and flesh \--PROGRAM to be better person | EROPYLOP--\ | MARGORP--+ | ENIRHS --+ | EGAMI--+ KROWTEN--+ EVIHCRA\:D | CARF--+ | LMTH--+ OKUKIN--\ | KLAT --+ | KOOB--+ CISUM--+ | +--PROGRAM | \--POLYPORE +--NARCISSISTIC DISTURB- ANCE | \--WATER \--PROGRAM +--VIDEO | \--NIKUKO +--HTML | +--FRAC | D:\ ARCHIVE +--NETWORK +--IMAGE | +--SHRINE | enob dna hself fo ENIRHS--+ | +--VIDEO +--MUSIC +--BOOK | +--TALK \--PROGRAM | doolb fo EROPYLOP--\ | nosrep retteb eb ot MARGORP--+ OKUKIN--\ | revol dna dneirf gnoma KLAT--+ | +--NARCISSISTIC DISTURBANCE--+ EYE DEFILED _ The Secret Code Curtain up. She bows. She recites the following: walklng oht ln tha mldst of my straamlng volca, soakad ln lt, wrackad by sobs, l wlll navar lat yoh down, ghstava, for me, you are breathless, i oromise my betters, i shall do as such, you will not be disaooointed, phaedre, phaedre, worry thls lnahghral dlsk, whara am l, who ls waltlng ln tha wlngs, l go onto tha proscanlhm, yoh ara thara, ghstava, waltlng. i am your ooor sara, i am your ooor sarrah, worry thls lnahghral dlsk, whara am l, who ls waltlng ln tha wlngs, l go onto tha proscanlhm, yoh ara thara, ghstava, waltlng transforms your walklng oht ln tha mldst of my straamlng volca, soakad ln lt, wrackad by sobs, l wlll navar lat yoh down, ghstava, i will oerform in the midst of leveled blues, in the midst of fragments, phaedre, phaedre, you will not be disaooointed, i oromise you, i oromise you ... She bows. She recites the following: walking out in the midst of my streaming voice, soaked in it, wracked by sobs, i will never let you down, gustave, for me, you are breathless, i promise my betters, i shall do as such, you will not be disappointed, phaedlre, phaedre, worry this inaugural disk, where am i, who is waiting in the wings, i go onto the proscenium, you are there, gustave, waiting, i am your poor nikuko, i am your poor nikuko, worry this inaugural disk, where am i, who is waiting in the wings, i go onto the proscenium, you are there, gustave, waiting, transforms your walking out in the midst of my streaming voice, soaked in it, wracked by sobs, i will never let you down, gustave, i will perform in the midst of leveled blues, in the midst of fragments, phaedre, phaedre, you will not be disappointed, i promise you, i promise you ... She bows. Curtain down. _ Hysteria I aim myself towards the sun. I open myself towards the sun. I splash and vomit the sun. When I am towards the sun, I am wayward. When the sun is towards me, I am Jennifer. I loan my frock to Julu, that is why I am called wayward. When Julu borrows my frock, I am Jennifer. When I am called, I am called wayward little girl. When I call, I am Jennifer. Devour wanton frock wayward Jennifer. I aim myself towards the sun. I open myself towards the sun. I splash and vomit the sun. When I am towards the sun, I am wayward. When the sun is towards me, I am Jennifer. Beyond the nervous, is hard, nervous. Beyond the wayward is Jennifer wayward. _ The Understudy Curtain rises. She enters, bows. She is exhausted. She recites: i'm finishad. tha drama is incandascant; tha drama is all that ramains. it comas from daap within; all you saa ls masqua ... skins slide from flesh, i lose them. i stumble around the stage. i call for you; it is useless. nothing can be done for me ... i em too tirad to go on tonight, too worn out. lifa must offar mora then this. my vary limbs trambla. i glenca unaesily ... this incandescent drama, you may have what remains of me, my uneasy glance belongs to you, my limbs tremble, tremble ... She leaves. The understudy enters. She bows. She recites: i em too tirad to go on tonight, too worn out. lifa must offar mora then this. my vary limbs trambla. i glenca unaesily ... i'm finishad. tha drama is incandascant; tha drama ls all that ramains. it comas from daap within; all you saa is masqua ... on me ... She leaves. Curtain falls. _ Interference Theory of Dis-ease The curtain rises. She walks to the front of the stage She bows. She begins to speak. There is no girl in my life. I watch you carefully. I learn from you. At night I'm sleepless. I want to focus on theory. I want to write philoso- phy. Instead, the sheets are trampled beneath me. I wake sweating with uneasy dreams. Without theory I am lost. Without you, I am more than lost; your limbs break my hypothesis. I am obsessive-compulsive. I follow you everywhere, I inhale you. Your scent surrounds me. I dream of your cast- off clothing. She bows. She speaks again. The boys tease me; I don't pay attention. They're not in my dreams. I am writing an essay; I am writing about ontology, about epistemology - I am talking to you. What is there to understand? I use the metaphor of eating - I want to devour you, devour everything about you. Wanting is like brea- thing; to want is to be wanton, think of nothing but you. It interferes, this metaphor - your body outlined in the window-light. I can't speak well, this emotion has surrounded me. She bows. She speaks again. Breathing is a kind of focusing. My nakedness is a gift; I write, always, naked. Ontology collapses in waves against the body; sight pries open the darkest secrets. This is the job of the philosopher and the lover; there is no differance. You duplicate yourself repeatedly; you are everywhere, shuddering within the fragile domains of objects, outlined against stones, trees, cars, radios, men and women. Are fantasies theories, theories fan- tasies? Are we knowing? Are we better people? She bows. She speaks again. I want to devour, want wanton, to devour more than ever, inhale flesh and cloth, hair and necklace, nail and effluvia, eyes and thinking that makes us human, against all techne, against all odds. It is my obsequious priv- ilege, my humiliation, to devour. You show yourself to me; that is, you walk in newer clothes. I show myself to you, naked and broken, written by theory, writing you, writing theory. She bows. She speaks again. I am afraid of nothing I devour. I am fearful of theory, of my dreams of theory, of my theory of dreams, of your dreams. Thank you for listening. She bows. The curtain falls. _ Dialog of an Executioner no separa-tion at all, just an indentation. The Florida Supreme Court has:the card—a cha d—is hang-ing, say by two corners. In other cases there is:Cite as: 531 U. S. ____ (2000) 7 Per Curiam them. In some cases a piece of:Supreme Court do not satisfy the minimum requirement for non-arbitrary:Supreme Court do not satisfy the minimum requirement for non-arbitrary Your his recount mechanisms implemented in response to the decisions of the Florida is across my lakes recount mechanisms implemented in response to the decisions of the Florida ideogrammar them. In some cases a piece of the card—a chad—is hang-ing,:r PeCurm:Cite as: 531 U. S. ____ (2000) 7:susceptible to much further refinement. In this instance,:decisions of the Florida Supreme Court do not satisfy the your protruding cases the general command to ascertain intent is not is in my giving recount mechanisms implemented in response to your dead passion seeps into their recount mechanisms implemented in response to the - turn- ing them violent executioner _ Calligraphic Calligraphy fascinates because it conjures the impossible coupling of the machine / incision / inscription - as if the world were divine (Foucauld- ian divinatio) with style leaving space for thought otherwise. I am refer- encing Chinese or Japanese calligraphy - not pictogrammatic, but gesture which infiltrates the line and its endings in various pathways. It is the space or gap which reveals both the inertness of the world and the place- ment of writing as breathing, not harboring ontology or name the things of creation, but slowing their undoing. You might see affect in the layering of symbols, always, as if it impossible to speak without the body in mind, as if all creations are inequal, languorous and dependent upon their emo- tional originations. This is not the concrete poetry of the calligraphic; it is not the renaissance emblem or shaped poetics or signature. Instead, one might look to the writing as the slow movement of the earths absolving all denumerations, definitions, taxonomies - or the earths' quickness in asserting themselves through the releasing of signs into the earth, stone, metal, air, water, fire ... the ideogrammar of non-being, ideogrammar of this world's last creation ... And this my own twisted stroke through all of it - the running writing, grass writing, clerical, seal, etc. Or perhaps not the seal with, so oft- en, its unnerving rectilinearity, already speaking confinement of the rim, the contract. Certainly through the varying width of strokes otherwise. In Seals (cdrom video), Azure and I demarcate each other's bodies, sealing them with hanko stone and ink; our bodies tangle; the kanji are worn out, worn through; exhausted, we're framed by the sealing processes; the ins- criptions of the world disappearing into the flesh; in a certain silence or background sound; you can watch in any order; there is also the clear evidence of desire, erection going nowhere, seals just above penis and vagina, the k/not of the writings - and presence or absence of the vacated space of non-being, as if this were the next-to-last ... Clearing a space, unnaming, all within the absenting of the frame as well, computer screen, software application screen, uncanny inertness of windows appearing and disappearing, inscription denying itself, an accumulation of protocols and languages tending towards their metaphoric dissolution ... Fu Shan: "With painstaking care, he used a centered brush tip to make strong, rounded strokes in imitation of the even, unmodulated lines in an- cient bronze inscriptions. He also undermined the readability of the sutra by littering it with strange characters. A religious text is seemingly transformed into a magical charm by an unreadably archaic script further confused by invented characters." (The Aesthetics of the Unusual and the Strange in Seventeenth-Century Calligraphy, by Dora C. Y. Ching, in Harr- ist and Fong, The Embodied Image: Chinese Calligraphy from the John B. Elliott Collection.) All machines of all languages and all words and all symbols and all subs- trates and all texts and all utterances and all pauses and all sounds and all worlds and all things and all non-things and all breaths and all mach- ines ... "And to dramative matters, Butor is an old friend of Klossowksi, and Klo- ssowski says: 'my syntax is Roberte's skin.' _My syntax,_ and not the sup- port for my writing or its eventual printing. And _Roberte's skin_ is the skin enclosing the volume of a discrete body carrying a proper name. Now isn't what Klossowski expresses here perversion? The hardness, the tension of grammar and glossary operate like the production of a screen stretched to the breaking point. This screen closes upon itself into a voluminous body - the body of Roberte - amd this body can be connected to a subject who will inhabit its interior. Thus any fixed variation of grammar, of glossary will produce a sign, a shiver, a passing of intensity upon the body proper of the victim." (False Flights in Literature, Jean-Francois Lyotard, in Toward the Post-Modern, ed. Harvey and Roberts.) One might call forth the brush against the computer screen, stretched to the breaking point across a skin wearing its display, immobilized, punc- tured, hung. All machines and all languages and all protocols and all and so forth and all ... ... "Can there be speech, poetry, and thought beyond the letter, beyond the death of the voice and the death of language?" (Pascoli and the Thought of the Voice, Giorgio Agamben, The End of the Poem, Studies in Poetics.) The imaginary of the sliding body within an inconceivability of the tech- nological (all technology is inconceivable), since, as for the calligraph- ic, it fastens itself (calligraphic ideogrammar) "It is therefore not truly a matter of phono-symbolism, but rather a mat- ter of a sphere so to speak beyond or before sound, a sphere that does not _symbolize_ anything as much as it simply _indicates_ an intention to sig- nify, that is, the voice in its originary purity." (ibid.) The calligraphic fastens itself only in order to release; nothing gnaws the end of the stroke or its delimitation, enumeration, against the radi- cals which presuppose ruined and incoherent taxonomies. The stroke is the weakest emission, however lending itself to techne, the rigorous ordering of the remains of the world. In Seals, after the stroke of the hanko against the rigorous skin, a drop of lubricant* appears at the tip of the penis, as if the body might then, after all is said and written, continue its slide elsewhere. *luminous __ Calligraphic Legacy Applications and the Scrawl unreadable calligraphic, the scrawl - one might think of the edgy brunt of the symbol, borders unprotected, conjectural spaces. what occurs to read- ing, paralleling outmoded tech - decades from now, cdroms will be as thick - unable to be decoded. from the analog to the digital, decoding becomes increasingly difficult. think of wire recording - this is readable at any speed - the double difficulty lies only in direction and speed. with mul- ti-tracking, an additional element - that of settlement of desired sounds - how many might play control-track background in the distant future? but all of this is relatively simple; helical-scan video - even scan-line vid- eo already plays calligraphic havoc. with digital, the problem is close to insurmountable - there are codes upon codes based on specific programs and protocols; there is the requirement of highly-sophisticated machinery - think of a 19th-century music-box cylinder without any other instructions - without knowing the scale employed or even the means of sound production - you're getting the idea. but the obtuse calligraphic itself is dependent upon the knowledge that, not only is the substrate readable, but the fault - if such it be - lies in the complex negotiation between writer and read- er - always already mediated. here again the unnerving, uncanny, unaccoun- table, is raised - as if the text has been cast loose from its overly fam- iliar mooring. think of xu bing or fu shan in this connection ... 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