Out of the Dream Came the Faucet is probably my most significant contribution to the question of dream symbolism. In this paper, I argue that the man who invented the faucet did so because he wanted a better penis. Generally speaking, everything man invents, devises, or finds ready-made in the world represents an attempt to improve his body, particularly his genitals.For instance. . .take my theory. Please!…Ha! Ha. Who says academics have no sense of humor?—But theoriously, Ladies and Genitals, before you begin firing questions here’s the whole quod est ball o’ praxis: see if you can follow me—but hey, fork your tongue in my ear and I’ll follow you anywhere—anyway, as I was saying before I was —and that’s damned hard to do: pre-prelapsarian, before being the apple in my parents’ eye, if you get my drive, ur, drift— so: the short of it—I’m using the long this evening—I am a man: I invented this theory. . . that all inventions. . . are attempts. . . by a man. . . to improve his genitals: Q.E.D.: I wrote Out of the Dream Came the Faucet to increase the meat-heating angle of my dangle, but!— and here’s where the going gets good and sticky—my invention, explains itself, thereby multiplying its power self-referentially, the old mirror in the mirror trick, making it much more likely to provide the type of “generally speaking” genital improvement desired by its inventor. I hope. Please. |
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