I am a carrier.

HCV has slipped its lipid envelope inside me and we are now spliced together forever in a symbiotic ecology.

I find this concept exciting rather than repulsive, the idea that two seperate species co exist in one body - my body . The part I find difficult is the invisibiliy and social stigma attached to my illness, the bad treatment from the sectors of the health profession, the ignorance of people not wanting to drink from the cups that I may have drunk from at social gatherings, people assuming that I am an injecting drug addict, and people being fearful to be in intimate relationship with me because of my virus.

I'm not to keen on the exhaustion either, makes being a digital artist, where large amounts of energy need to be exerted in short periods of time, very difficult. I have just started interferon combination treatment, and I hate having to inject myself, but the side effects aren't too bad. I have changed my lifestyle and diet , do yoga and meditaion, take natural interferon boosters and naturopathic medication to support my western medical treatment. My disease has sparked a few other autoimmune dieases including a thyroid disorder which I now have to deal with as well - but I have achieved some sort of balance and acceptance.

HCV has taught me to take care of myself, to not drink, not stay up too late, not get too stressed. I have to say no to a lot of social events which has changed my friendships, but the ones that have sustained are stronger and more rewarding. I can't hang round with people who don't take care of thier bodies, and I have a small support group of people who understand cause they have had other chronic illness too. We have all faced the fear of our disability and death, and come to an acceptance of what living differently means, and... we laugh a real lot.

Life is precious and beautiful, and this virus has given me a new perspective on it.

Thanx for looking at carrier, I have dedicated this site to the 200 million people in the world who are HCV positive.

Melinda