Hi Everyone,

I have been trying to cope with the knowledge that I have a serious, chronic, life threatening disease, since I was diagnosed in 1992.

Apparently I contracted it with a blood transfusion in 1966. I am so thankful that I have found this list. Your posts not only educate me, but keep me laughing and crying.

My question is this....So many of you seem so well adjusted (I know, don't laugh), and you seem to take everything in stride....the hellish treatments, being non-responders to interferon, thinking about the possiblility of liver failure, transplants and cancer...and on and on and on. How in the world do you do it?

I find that I spend a lot of time with my emotions bouncing back and forth. When I started interferon I was hopeful. When I didn't respond I was devastated. After quitting the interferon, it took me a year to stop worrying and get on with my life.

I was just beginning to enjoy a sense of well being and put all the fear behind me(without neglecting my health...still going for labs, etc) when my doc called and said, "You know, the natural history of this disease is much worse than we originally thought. I would like you to try the combo treatment." So now I am thrown back into the role of being a "sick person."

I HATE THIS!

How do you do it? How do you keep a balance in your life? How do you take care of yourself, stay aware of what is going on in the Hep world, yet still function with a sense of hope for the future? Right now I am throwing the biggest pity party ever for myself. I hate myself when I get like that. If any of you have any words of wisdom, I would surely appreciate it.

I used to be a happy-go-lucky, fun-loving person.

I'd like to find that person again.

Thanks,

Susan